Oy, did I ever get in trouble yesterday. My pal Sophie was taking a snooze on the couch – which is about all the old gal ever does these days – and I was bored, so I jumped up on top of her and barked, “Yo, Soph! Come watch me chase squirrels in the backyard!”

Sophie yelped. My dog mom and dad yelled. I was sent outside, but I felt too lonesome and guilty to chase any varmints.

See, I thought Sophie was kind of faking it. Our people give her lots of treats like TJ’s Health Bites and yummy people food like beef broth and rice (hand-fed, yet!), not to mention tons of ear scratches and kisses. So why not just lay on the couch all day?

She reminded me of my pawl Mr. Peanut, a clever wiener dog who pretends his back leg is broken and drags it along whenever his people want him to go outside. I tell you, if they gave an animal Oscar for “Best Performance by a Dog Faking a Major Injury,” Mr. P would be a shoo-in.

But Sophie isn’t pretending. She might be sick for a long time, so my people are training me to be gentle around her. My fellow pooches, I’d like to share with you some of the things I’m learning so you don’t ever get into the big trouble I did. And since it’s flu season, you might want to put down that bone for a sec and really pay attention, allrighty?

If your pooch or people pal seems real pooped and just wants to sleep all day, go ahead and let them. With a lot of rest, they might feel better sooner and ready to play with you again.

Don’t jump on your sick pal. They won’t like it at all, trust me.

Don’t bark at them, either. Your yapping won’t make them get better any faster.

If your sick pooch pal is getting lots more attention from your people than you are, don’t be jealous. I bet the pooch would gladly give up all those extra tummy rubs just to feel better.

If your people pal is under the weather, don’t nag them to take you for a walk. It won’t hurt you to skip a day or two.

It’s okay to give your pal a very, very gentle smooch every now and then to let them know you care.

With a little TLCC (tender loving canine care), your pal is sure to feel better in no time!

Leroy is a 4-year-old “Terribull” adopted from a Carson, Calif., shelter by i Love Dogs writer Laura Goldman. When he’s happy, Leroy snorts just like a pig. He really misses his gal pal Sophie, who has crossed the Rainbow Bridge. But he adores his new pawl Ella and his chew toys (a little too much). Check out Leroy’s other articles!

You know that great feeling when your pet parents get you all leashed up and put you in the car for a bye-bye? And then once you’re on the road, that sinking feeling when you start smelling the vet’s office from a mile away?

I used to feel your pain, my fellow pooches, but now I look forward to these trips, and I’ll tell you why.

• Of course it’s no fun at all to get poked with that shiny, pointy thing, but it only lasts a second or two, and then you get lots of ear scratches and maybe even a tasty treat – am I right, my dears?
• It’s also a pain in the tail (BOL!) when they take your temperature. Again, it only takes a second or two and then you usually get rewarded with at least a nice ear scratch.
• The vet has a magical way of making me feel better whenever I’m under the weather. Sometimes I have to swallow really yucky pills, but they’re usually followed by a tasty treat.
• My vet is very nice and has a gentle touch. I bet yours does too. Sometimes an exam can be the next best thing to a belly rub!
• The waiting area is almost like a dog park – so many new pooches to meet! The darlings are usually stunned by my calm demeanor and ask me how I can be so relaxed. “Vet?” I bark. “Schmet.”
• If your pooch pawl is going to the vet with you, your calmness can actually rub off on her. To tell you the truth, a trip to the vet’s used to make me shake like a Chihuahua. Then my old pawl Larry demonstrated how much easier the whole ordeal is if you just relax and try to make it a fun experience. He was absolutely right. Now I’ve passed this wisdom on to my buddy Leroy, and he likes vet visits as much as I do.

So the next time you smell the distinct fragrance of the vet’s office, do not fear – instead, think about all the ear scratches and tasty treats you’re bound to get!

What do you like about going to the vet? Let us know in the Comments area below!

was almost 84 dog years old when she crossed the Rainbow Bridge. She was adopted by i Love Dogs writer Laura Goldman in 1998 from a Hawthorne, Calif. shelter. She was adopted by i Love Dogs writer Laura Goldman when she was a year old from the spcaLA shelter in Hawthorne, Calif. Sophie loved long naps, looking out the front windows and, most of all, her best buddy Leroy. Check out her other articles!

PHOTO: U.S. Air Force

The Kong toy filled with totally yummy peanut butter…the gray tennis ball that used to be yellow…the stuffed T. rex missing its tail…my stuff is awesome!

But you know what makes me growl?  When somebody tries to take my stuff! I learned the hard way not to snarl when my dog mom tried to pry my favorite rubber bone from my mouth. That was the last I ever saw of that awespme bone…and let’s just say my dog mom was more than a little bit mad at me.

So how are we pooches supposed to guard our stuff without getting in trouble? Here are just a couple of new tactics you might want to try:

Okay, I admit it, I’m a hoarder. Big time. But after what happened with my rubber bone, I’ve learned the secret to successful stuff guarding: make big puppy-dog eyes. My irresistable adorableness always scores me a nice pat on the head, and my stuff is left alone! It’s ridiculously easy, and it works every time. Try it!

If you share your home with another pooch, you’ll have to use your noggin’ to figure out good places to hide your stuff. For example, if you’re a Chihuahua and your poochmate is a St. Bernard, hide your stuff under the bed, where it’s guaranteed to be safe and sound!

See? It’s pretty easy to guard your stuff and stay out of the dog house – that’s unless, of course, you actually want to go in the dog house! BOL!

Leroy is a 4-year-old “Terribull” adopted from a Carson, Calif., shelter by i Love Dogs writer Laura Goldman. When he’s happy (which is almost all the time), Leroy snorts just like a pig. He loves his cool stash of chew toys (a little too much). He still misses his sweet gal Sophie, but he’s head-over-paws in puppy love with his new gal pawl, Ella.

Written by Irie the Jackahuahua

I’m going to tell you the truth, okay chicas y chicos? I’ve been doing the stuff since I was just a little chiquitica baby in my mami’s paws. That’s right, I would do anything to get to it, that white stuff. Y que? Don’t judge me you bola de mutts! I’m a little pup you know, but don’t let the cute droopy ear and button nose fool you, ‘ay? I’m a tough puppy, been to the puppy pen and everything. That’s right, caged up and left behind till my human mami and papi adopted me.

When they brought me home I didn’t know how to tell them sabes? They looked at me, just three months old, so sweet, so innocent. But, I had the shakes. Hadn’t had a fix in days and here I was free at last. I wanted to be so good, I swear! But, when you get out of that place you just can’t help yourself, especially when the white stuff’s everywhere in these human houses! It calls your nombre, whispers to you when the humans aren’t looking, “Iriiiie… Monaaa… come put me in your mouth. I’m so delicious. I make your teeth feel so good. I smell like doggie heaven.”

The humans just don’t understand! In un momento you are mami and papi’s angel and in the next, when you’re on the stuff eres como Kujo! You can’t have just one hit, you have to have two, three, sometimes five all at once surrounding you like clouds of white, fluffy, happy shots of smelly goodness and you think, “How could I ever live without you? Never will I ever leave you again my little white friends! Booooow woooooow!”

My name is Irie, and I’m a Sockaholic. I should clarify: I was a sockaholic. Red socks, black socks, dress socks, knee-high, ankle-length, embroidered, rainbow-colored children’s socks. I am embarrassed to admit it perritos, but I’ve tried them all. But be honest, haven’t you?

Our kind, puppy pals, have an unfortunate disposition towards sock addiction. I know you feel me homedoggies, you watch as the laundry arrives, gets spread out onto the bed and your eyes are fixated on that pile of white deliciousness. The white cotton ones are my sock of choice: easy access, always in season, siempre an abundance available.

You might feel helpless as every day that passes you try desperately to be the cute, adorable puppy your mami and papi believe you are. Don’t fret mis perrito amigos, because when things get out of control you can turn to Sockaholics Anonymous. There, I learned five easy steps to taking back my life. Follow these steps for a surefire way to get tons of belly rubs from your human:

1. Andale my puppies, admit that you are powerless over those lovely socks. Make the choice to turn your pup vidas around, and let your humans restore you to sanity.

2. Perritos, take an inventory of chew toys and biscuits that surround you in plentitude. Heed your humans when they tell you that these, not the socks, belong in your mouth.

3. Cachorritos, gather those socks you have harmed (the de-threaded, the saliva-soaked, the holey ones) and ask them to forgive you your wrongs.

4. Amigos, roll onto your backs, paws in the air, tongue to the breeze, and like Tyra Banks says “smile with your eyes”. Your human will know that you are good at heart.

5. And lastly perritos, when the urge overtakes you, lie in meditation and remember the big piece of bacon that awaits you if you are good.

Practice this every day my puppies and you’ll see how the need for the white stuff leaves you. Besos y abrazos my little friends, and remember, when times are tough you’ve got to keep your snout up.

Irie LaMona (The Little Doll) is a 7-month-old mixed breed, bilingual Jack Russell Terrier/Chihuahua adopted from the South Los Angeles Animal Shelter. Still a puppy, she aspires to one day host her very own show, and be the Oprah of mixed breed pups around the world!

Written by Irie the Jackahuahua

Mis perritos, first impressions can last a lifetime, que no? I’m at about that age and in that phase, yes my amiguitos, they call it puppy love. But, I’m a bit nervous. I know what you’re thinking, me? Nervous? So fiercely independent, so Jackahuahuatastic? Even I have my insecurities cachorritos. I’m starting to notice all of the cute stud-licious boy toys at the doggie park and all I can think is “how does my rear end look?!” How do I get mami and papi to remember to give me a good grooming before the dog park, not after! They swear that a bath before the dog park is useless, sheesh, tell that to my waning love life.

The humans just don’t understand. You meet that special perrito for the first time, those floppy ears, fuzzy snout, big strong paws, and those rippling… hind legs; pues, you get what I mean, it’s nerve-racking! Do you lick their snout first, do you greet them with a quick sniff to the booty, or should you linger extra long so they know you’re really interested? Ay mis perritos, it’s a doggie jungle out there, and to make matters worse, there’re all these dog cougars picking up on all the young pups. Leave some for the rest of us, locas!

Some mutts are just not that in to you. But how do you know?! My mami’s trainer friend says que pues if the dog is all stiff and tense then leave him alone. But, what if he smells so good you just can’t get away? “Oh, nice booty cologne Fido, very sexy.”

It’s a tragedy mis amigos! I’m terrible at this. You have to worry about boundaries, and will his human swat you away with a newspaper because they just don’t get that you need just one more whiff to know if he’s “the one”? Y to top it off, the humans make you feel so self-conscious with their yelling – “Gross, she’s sniffing his butt!” and “Don’t do that, bad girl!” Do I go and call you gross when you hug your silly human friends? Don’t I do the whole song and dance of licking your mouth when you ask for a kiss? Pues, then stop making me feel so ashamed for trying to find the love of my life you big meanies (or loves, I’m too cute for just one boyfriend, girl please!).

 It’s so tiring you know? Going dog to dog to dog – are you male? No. Next. Are you in heat? No. Next. I like you, do you like me? No. Next. Ay, don’t bite! Nope. Next. You like how my tail does what?! (paw slap to the snout) Nope. Next. Talk about speed dating! I’m such a young pup, tan bonita, perky, great personality, but why can’t I find him? Dating’s got me doggie tuckered out. The perrito park is a sea of would-be boyfriends, but how will I ever make the right impression?

 Ay mis perros, it’s a long journey, I know some of you feel me. I’ll continue the search, but in the meantime, as my homedog Tupac says, “Ladies, you gotta keep your snout up.”

Irie La Mona (The Little Doll) is a 7-month-old mixed breed, bilingual Jack Russell Terrier/Chihuahua adopted from the South Los Angeles Animal Shelter. Still a puppy, she aspires to one day host her very own show, and be the Oprah of mixed breed pups around the world!

Although I’m almost 84 in dog years, in my mind and heart I’m still a puppy – but unfortunately, my body can’t always keep up with what my brain wants it to do.  (I’m sure all you older pooches and people know exactly what I mean.) So drop that tennis ball and check out these activities that are lots of fun but won’t wear us senior dogs out.

• Keep on going for regular walks, but don’t do a marathon. A couple of short walks a day is better than one long one for senior dogs. Your people can keep your senses stimulated by mixing it up a little and taking a different route each time. When you get home, I highly recommend begging for a nice massage to relieve any soreness.
   
• Take lots of naps. Napping is a verb, dears, which means it’s an activity.
   
• Invite yourself along to social gatherings. Working a roomful of people with wags and kisses helps keep us alert and mobile.
   
• We older pooches also make great therapy dogs since we’re calmer than our younger counterparts. There are plenty of people in hospitals, nursing homes and schools who would love to scratch our ears and give us a nice tummy rub!
   
• Teaching an old dog new tricks is not just a cliché – it actually works, and provides us with lots of mental exercise! In fact, I just learned how to impress all my pals by offering them a paw to shake.
   
• Chew toys are a senior dog’s best friends. And so are peanut butter-flavored treats. Chew toys filled with peanut butter-flavored treats? Those are our “BFFs,” as the puppies say.
   
• If you have a swimming pool and the weather is warm, go ahead and do a little dog paddling.
   
• From personal experience, I can tell you that having a younger pooch around keeps me feeling like a puppy. Just be sure to train the l’il whippersnapper  to sit and stay whenever you need to rest. It works like a charm with my pal Leroy!

 I know we’re still pups at heart, but be sure you don’t overexert yourself when doing any of these or other activities. If you’re coughing or losing your appetite, be sure your people take you to a vet right away.

Also make sure your people regularly give you doggie vitamins and supplements to keep you in the pink. Personally I adore TJ’s Health Bites because they’re so peanut-buttery good and easy for an old gal like me to chew.

Remember – napping is an activity, my dear friends, so if you get tuckered out, find a warm spot and treat yourself to a nice snooze!

Do you have any ideas for fun activities with a senior dog? Please share them in the Comments area below!

Sophie was almost 84 dog years old when she passed to the Rainbow Bridge last November. She was adopted by i Love Dogs writer Laura Goldman in 1998 from a Hawthorne, Calif. shelter. She loved long naps, looking out the front windows and most of all, her best buddy Leroy. Check out her other articles!